Normally, I would not recommend praising your children for “tattling” on each other. But you don’t have MY kids.
Munchkin #1 has a built in safety monitor feature and Munchkin #2, the yin to her sister’s yang, likes to test all boundaries – especially if she feels she will get a laugh out of her actions. Blasted gene pool.
Therefore, when I’m not watching M2 every second of the day – because she is six and shouldn’t need 24hr one-on-one monitoring – I often praise the stars above M1 is an appropriate nark.
Yesterday, I stepped out of the family room while the girls were having “quiet time.” For most families you would think quiet time would be a good thing, resembling perhaps a Norman Rockwell painting or kitties frolicking in a dewy meadow. Birds quietly singing while the children read books from a sunny window seat.
My house… not so much.
Munchkin #2 decided to play some educational reading games on the iPad. Reading! Yes, reading. I was excited and that counts for quietness, right?! She is getting to be such a fabulous reader and the fact she wanted to read during quiet time was such a newfound blessing.
Fifteen minutes into the blissful silence, which I must say is rare…and I mean RARE because these girls talk and sometimes scream in their sleep; I hear from the other room:
“How do you spell ‘mean?’” asks the youngest.
“Like being mean to somebody?” asks Munchkin #1.
“No, like I mean it,” replies M2.
The oldest feeling quite proud of her spelling skills, spells the word correctly for her younger sister and then it goes back to silence. They are helping each other out and I couldn’t be prouder of my children than at that moment. What a magnificent summer we were going to have.
Five minutes later:
My oldest runs into my room with a panicked look on her face. It’s obviously not going be good and is going to erase my proud mama high.
“(M2) is emailing someone on the iPad and they just wrote back to her!” she reported.
I can only hope I didn’t curse like a sailor, but I can’t be certain. When you almost step on a snake in the woods, words just come out of your mouth and you have no control over what they are. This was one of those emergent moments.
Flying through the air like Michael Jordan used to do before he got old and started advertising his undies, I grabbed the iPad from M2 who was smirking and not making eye contact – a sign she was quite proud of her actions.
Me: Who were you emailing?
M2: I don’t know.
Me: (yanking the iPad from her hands) Give me that…Schnookems (for Farfanuggen sakes!)
I began to scan the screen. The phone number at the top showed me it was a text to a business associate of mine. Yes. She could have chosen one of my crazy friends or relatives to start her “drunk-esque” texting but a person with whom I do business? Nice!
Here my child’s first anonymous text:
Let’s just say, if your children need to contact my child for any reason, she is unable to comment. M2’s texting privileges have been revoked until…WE GET HER A PHONE IN COLLEGE!
Have your kids done anything like this? What have they done to embarrass you? Any calls that cost you big time? I’d love to hear about your kids so I can bask in your pain too. Share the pain…please!!!