Have you ever been so crazy about a lost item, the next thing to lose was your mind? It’s happening right here in the heartland of our country. No, it’s not that Black Friday has lost its staying power by oozing its way earlier every year. I’m saying, I’ve lost my tweezers for the umpteenth time and I’m going to go postal!!
Oh, you twitter, tee-hee or laugh aloud. You think it’s cute or perhaps brings up memories of the time you lost something silly or trivial. Well, let me tell you peeps THIS is different!! And three weeks into chin growth, I am a prickly woman on a mission!
“So go and buy a new pair, ridiculous woman!” you say? Really. What a novel idea. Why hadn’t I thought of that? FIVE inadequate pairs later and tapping into my children’s college fund, I still can’t find a pair to pull out the mothah of all hairs, and I’m NOT going to shave them off, so don’t ask!
“Please Ma’am, empty out your pockets,” says the ever-lively TSA personnel.
“There are no pockets in mommy sweatpants,” I reply with head hanging low.
“Do you have any watches, jewelry, or belts you forgot to remove?”
“No.” I whisper. “I haven’t worn a belt since my first child was born.”
“Step to the side so we can use the wand, please.” says the understanding TSA worker.
“OK! So I lost my tweezers and I can’t get these chin hairs out and they are made of steel, I tell ya! Have you happened to confiscate any tweezers from anyone? Please, can I go through that bucket and search for a good pair. I’m having no luck and I can’t get these suckers out?”
When you hit bottom, you hit bottom. This afternoon I might just load up the kids in the minivan and take a drive up to the airport to go through that bucket. Maybe TSA will have a good pair like the one’s I lost weeks ago.
I’m that desperate!!!
Nurse Mommy Laughs has been nominated for “Circle of Mom’s Top 25 Book Author Moms 2012 list” – you can vote every 24hrs to help me get this FANCY AWARD! Help this nurse out and don’t be afraid of the click…
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© 2012, Stacey Hatton. All rights reserved.